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How To - Find the Right Practitioner


Hello, friends!

I didn't realize it has been so long since I added some different types of posts - but since I had to do an overhaul of my website + blog, I haven't added too much new information. I have been trying to add more educational posts to my website, not just as a resource for myself but also to help those who are on their journey. There is a lot of information out there and I am a research junkie. Honestly, I am wondering if this is more of a problem being this way, but I enjoy diving deep into various topics and learning as much as I can about them.


I have always loved astrology and often call it my "gateway drug" into the witchy woo woo world. I picked up my first Tarot deck at 14 and just dove off the deep end into all things out there. After my whole "awakening" process began, I really started seeing things ramp up. When I was a child I could see and speak to spirits, and I could also dream of things that came to pass. These were different from using tools such as astrology and the tarot to gain understanding. These were gifts that I wanted to understand and work with further.

In this process of trying to understand my natural gifts, my interests, or even just find some sense of solidarity, I would reach out to local psychics and other people who I thought would try to help me understand myself better. Sometimes I was met with talented people, who were naturally gifted, but they would try to take advantage of my desperation, lack of education, and vulnerability.

I have seen a lot of videos online talking about fake psychics and those who take advantage of those who are grieving, in difficult situations, or those who are so desperate for answers, help, or just friendship that they end up paying these scammers thousands of dollars. So, I thought I would share my own stories regarding my experiences and why I have worked so hard to be a thoughtful and genuine person in this industry. And in sharing my stories, I hope that it helps those to try to find the right practitioners, tarot readers, astrologers, Reiki healers, and other magic makers in their life.


This is not meant to bash, call out, or harm anyone - I have made my peace with my experiences, and it is why I share so openly with others.

THE BEGINNING


In 2013, in the middle of my Saturn Return, I had a whole upheaval in my life. I lost someone I had considered my soul sister, my youngest had serious medical issues, I was in the middle of building and purchasing my first home. Things were not going smoothly, I was feeling a little lost - so I found a random "Tarot and Psychic Palm Reader" in the Houston area. Decided to "treat" myself and see what someone with an objective point of view might have to say to me. She was good. Until she wasn't.

You might not believe it, but she started in on the same thing - as a previous experience that I had when I was about 5 years younger. The same old trope:


I had a negative curse on me since birth and she was the only one who could remove it.


The reason I knew this was a gig, was that a few years before in the middle of some spooky things that had happened to me, I sought out guidance from non-traditional means. I had exhausted all of the other ways I thought would help, as I felt like I was seriously losing my mind.


Now, I have always seen and experienced spirits around me - feeling their presence, hearing their messages. But as I grew older, there were parts of me that closed myself off - unless it was a very powerful experience. Haunted spaces, people, and things would get through - and usually not the benevolent aspects of this gifts showed themselves to me. When I started feeling like I was being haunted by something very dark, something that in my fearful and vulnerable state, I could not manage on my own.


I went to the churches begging for help. I was very scared. At this time, I had recently watched The Haunting of Emily Rose and some of the similarities had me running to anything that would help. I was drowning myself in alcohol to get some sleep, sometimes working 3 jobs at the same time to just not be at home and feel alone, or even trying to escape my home elsewhere.


Some of the experiences I had in that space still scare me - they literally traumatized me. I have fears that may seem a little silly. But they come from what happened while I lived in that house. Now, I am not too clear on whether it was the actual home or just me at the time that made everything compound into the shit show it became for me. I was almost choked by my shower curtain in the shower. I had something claw my legs up while I was sleeping. I had something try to smother me in bed. At the time, I had my lovely familiar, Bonn - a beautiful retired Military Working dog, that I rescued when I got out of the Army. He was attached a the hip with me - we went everywhere together. He moved out of state with me from Marlyand back to Texas. He would often wake me by barking in the hallway in the middle of the night. He was the quietest dog I ever met - he had been trained to not bark unless it was to alert - so anytime I would wake up to him growling and barking, I knew there was something to be aware of in the area. This went on for months. I kept growing in my fear - and was terrified that something would also hurt my child, as well.


I eventually broke down, as I knew I could no longer handle it myself.


So, seeking out a mental health professional, I realized that this was much more than an issue with my mind. It helped in realizing how my fears and anxiety were also making it more difficult for me to distinguish between reality and what was happening.


I found a local psychic online. Called and made an appointment to go see her. Didn't disclose what was going on.


The day came and I went to see her. I was afraid and young and inexperienced. She was very good and spot on with everything that had happened to me, described my child without me prompting her, and knew a lot of little things about my life that really convinced me she was legit. She had not asked me anything and I went in clothing I wouldn't normally wear or took anything that would give too much away about who I was. As I have said before, I am a natural skeptic - so I didn't want to give her things to read off of before I even went in.


She did her whole thing. She was blowing my mind. I was highly impressed.


But of course, things took a bit of a turn. She picked up on my fears and said I was being haunted in some way and that my fears were feeding into this thing. She told me she could help me for a small fee of $1500. Mind you, I had just separated from the Army - it was 2007 and the "recession" was in the first throes of how it was going to be with unemployment. I couldn't find a job, and was living off of all the money I had stashed away when I was in the Army. I was receiving very small unemployment checks that barely covered groceries. I freaked out a bit as I felt so much more fear rise up in me that I wouldn't be able to handle this very real issue and maybe even have more problems because of it.


I told her I didn't have the money for it, so she suggested pawning things, bringing her my jewelry, doing whatever I could. I stupidly gave her all of my jewelry, things of financial value, and whatever cash I could get on hand.


You want to know what her healing was?


A plastic rosary. Getting sprayed down with a lavender spray. Being told to burn a candle and sage (her instructions were so vague that I literally used the herb sage in my spice rack - lol). And being told that I needed to write affirmations on sticky notes around my house.


That was a $1500 lesson that really showed me so much about myself.


I vowed to myself that I would never let anyone else EVER be taken advantage of in their fear or to feel so disempowered in their situation that they can not handle things on their own.


It was an expensive lesson in learning to trust myself. Her reminder that I had everything in me to heal myself, to fix whatever was scaring me, and to deal with whatever bad juju was trying to fuck with me, was worth the $1500.


THIS WAS WELL WORTH IT.


Because now.... I was encouraged to share this with others and to show them how to do this stuff, too.


It opened up a curiosity in me that has only led me down a path of understanding myself further and opening myself up to my own personal power. Her giving me the vague instructions to handle this myself - really forced me to sit with myself and do some serious thinking about the entire situation.


So, as you could imagine - once this other random lady came after me during her reading, I couldn't do much more but laugh in her face and call her out. She didn't like it and then wanted to berate me saying I was a horrible mother for passing down this "curse" to my children. Mind you, she was pregnant - and I just stared at her in disbelief saying she was so much better than this and that I couldn't imagine being so unethical as to want to basically instill fear in others in order to gain a few coins from them.


I walked out of that place cracking up.


Unfortunately, due to the interwebs and me connecting with her in that way, she started to harass me online. It only cemented my experience with her.


I decided to do a little digging into this woman, and realized she sounded a lot like someone who had been doing this scam to others in California. And I mean she was SCAMMING people out of thousands of dollars. People who are grieving. People who need true help from mental health professionals. People who are having real crises in their lives which make it difficult to cope with what life needs.


It only enraged me further.


I made a promise to keep pursuing my gifts, to be a true healer, to really try to help others, to be encouraging, and to share what I have learned along the way.


Because I didn't want anyone else to be take advantage of by another predatory "tarot reader."

FAKING IT VS. MAKING IT


I was afraid to lean into my own power. Granted, I will always remember the words that the first predatory psychic said to me - "You are psychic, too but you will NEVER be like me or as strong as me."


I didn't realize how damaging that one little sentence has been to me this whole time. It showed me that I was not crazy for seeing, hearing, or feeling things - but it made me feel that at the end of the day, it wouldn't be good enough to help myself out.


I made up my mind in 2008 to take myself more seriously and devoted myself to my studies more thoroughly. I leaned heavily into Tarot and Astrology due to their structure. I like the logical, the things that have "proof" so I can show why these things flow together or what they mean. During this time period, I had a lot of major life changes, which also opened me up in all new ways to myself and also my natural gifts. I was lucky enough to meet someone who was an Angel Channeler at this time in my life who really helped me feel more comfortable with the things I was going through and experiencing. I latched onto these parts within myself and started to trust my mediumship and channeling abilities for the first time in my life. I started reading for others for free from 2009 until about early 2014. I was afraid to charge and I was almost shamed for wanting to do so.


Eventually, I was encouraged by a few amazing souls that the effort, natural gifts, and tools I had invested in were worth me asking to be reimbursed for my time spent away from my family to help others. I will still admit that I often doubt myself and have confidence issues about my gifts and how things come through. But after spending the last 11 years speaking with strangers and doing this work, I see the growth as I learn to release expectation about what my work should be like.


The reason I had such a strong reaction to the second lady who tried to pull one over on me, is that I realize that while some people out there might really want to help others and have amazing gifts to share, there are many who use the vulnerabilities of others and abuse the situation by instilling fear. Or even create a bigger problem for someone who is desperate. My work has always been driven by my personal morals and ethics. I am not always right or have done the right thing - but I do try my best to be honest, real, and ethical with all of my clients.


So here are some of the few things to keep in mind to find the right practitioner for you and the work you are seeking.

YOUR VIBE ATTRACTS SCAM ARTISTS


Alright, I will more than likely sound a bit petty here but - given my own past experiences and even in speaking with other clients, friends, and random people on the internet - I see that this is a common thing that happens.


We have all seen that meme that says - Your vibe attracts your tribe - but for this, I am changing it up to: Your vibe attracts scam artists.


Now, what do I mean by this?


Well, most people seek out guidance when they are in a period of their life where they are confused, lost, or feel that they need someone else to clarify something that is going on. There is already a level of vulnerability going out to seek someone to guide you. Before the whole spiritual exploration that has happened the last 5 or so years, people would have to go locally to the little corners of their cities and towns to find the local "witch" or "psychic palm tarot reader" that could give them a good little reading for about 10 or 15 minutes before they break into their groove of you having a "negative curse from birth that can only be removed by them." And most people being encouraged by the fact that the reading was good (it usually is), and feeling lost/confused/scared at that moment, will fall prey to this or leave the session feeling like they are being bamboozled.


For the few people who are vulnerable enough to want to heal themselves by these scam artists, this almost becomes a never-ending cycle. It is truly unfortunate.


The second "tarot reader" who came at me with this whole gig was laughable to me because I had already been taken advantage of previously. I looked her up and saw she had been running this scam in different states under different names. This is why I wanted to lean more into helping others and actually making a difference to these stereotypes. It is why I offer so much free information and show others that they can also do this work, too.


We all have access to our divine selves.

GET READY


The most important aspect to take into consideration when looking for someone to work with you is not just reviews and what you might find online about them. Go and check out their presence and their content. Does it seem to resonate or speak to you? Do you like their style, communications, or even just how they connect online?


While word of mouth is important and can really make you feel more at ease when going to see someone about this sort of work, it isn't always easy to find someone locally or even online that you connect with.


As I stated above, some people can be a bit predatory. You can minimize this by being prepared for the session. You practitioner should have a communication style that works for you. I prefer to connect with my clients via email for setting up any work so there is always a means of going back to ensure there was no miscommunication on my end. I have an online store and also have a feature on my website with various reviews (and you can see the link to my previous Etsy shop with reviews there, as well), and I am also found on FB pages with reviews, too. The reviews I share are not just things that I have polished to make me seem more credible. They span years of my work and various services along the journey. Read up on who you are trusting to read you.

Now, while I know not everyone is going to have a professional website and everything flowing and going from the get-go, try to get a feeling for the person's style and what you feel drawn to. This work is very important and we should be picky about who we go to for nourishment.


And I completely understand that I am not the bees knees to some, which is totally fine. If they are looking for a specific service or style, I also will recommend other people in this community that I know and trust to connect with them. You can find out more about other magical creatures I know on my FAVES tab.


WATCH OUT


Okay, so you found someone that you like and perhaps feel comfortable getting a reading/session/something from them.


Here are a few warning signs to keep in mind:


- They require you to give up a lot of your personal information that doesn't relate too much to what you are having done (i.e. birth name and DOB for just a palm reading - the information shared should make sense for the work).

- They say that you have a magical curse and only they can remove it, which would require an inordinate amount of money (i.e. $1k+) given to them before they are willing to help you and no one else can help you to remove it.

- You only go to them for one small thing (say a tarot reading), and then they try to frighten you into purchasing an expensive package to heal you.

- They belittle or berate you for not wanting to move forward with their work.

- They instill a lot of fear and say you will be cursed from now on.

- They try to bully you into giving them more money.

- They threaten to hex or curse you for not doing what they want.


Remember you are the paying client and should hold power over what does continue to happen in your relationship with your practitioner. While suggestions for other work are common - especially if a client has a lot going on and feels as if they need something else, but you should never be scared to keep going through your life due to something your practitioner said to you. While not all messages are filled with amazingness, to leave a session and be MORE afraid or feel MORE confused is not beneficial.


Readings and healing sessions should leave a client feeling more centered, clearer, and just a bit more stable in their journey.

Be aware that in your vulnerable state some people may take advantage of you. We have the power to minimize that and also can get the clarity we seek, if we just take a moment to choose the right people to work with. Unfortunately, many people have just joined the spiritual movement, as they see the potential to make a lot of money from very vulnerable people who use some of their gifts, experiences, and perhaps even a little trickery to get a little coin.


Find someone who shares a similar ethical stance to yours.


At the end of the day, all gifts are personal and it is up to each individual to connect in ways that make sense to them. Yes, there are people who see this lifestyle as a current trend and might be doing more harm than good, but there are a lot of fantastically gifted souls out there that only desire to help others and have spent a lot of time, money, and energy in trying to be incredible healers, readers, astrologers, and also do their best to bring magic into the world.


As long as we have existed there are people who like to take, hurt, and steal from others. This is just another scam for some to use as a means of getting a few coins to rub together. The right practitioners will always understand you as a person, and will try their best to provide services that serve your highest good.


I hope that some of the things I discussed here, help you find the right people that resonate with you to work with. I know what it is like to be take advantage of when I was vulnerable and scared, and while that lesson cost me a pretty penny, it has also given me the world within myself. I learned to trust myself and to look inwards first before I seek external validation for what my soul knows.


And that is all I hope others can find within themselves - except without getting scammed.

Thanks for being here and I can't wait to share more fun posts and share more of what I have learned along the way.

#empath

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