It Is What It Is

What an empowering little phrase, right? It is so applicable to so many situations, circumstances, and relationships. When is the last time you applied it to your current life? So much punch to it.

It is what it is.

Five simple words. Strung together to bring you back. Grounding.

Let me tell you a little secret......

I struggle a lot. With myself. With my growth. With being present. With being aware. I always try to see the best in others. This isn't a bad trait to possess. If anything, I am proud of this big, ol' open heart I have. Has it caused me to be hurt repeatedly? Yes. Will I shrink it down? No.

I always want the people in my life to be like me - loyal, honest, and unapologetically themselves. I don't always get this. It disappoints me. And that's okay. I have a right to feel that way. My expectations of finding like-minded unity in others are not often returned, and more often than not, unfulfilled. But one thing I have changed is that I have learned to release. I release them. I release my expectations. I release my need to have them fill a place in my life. I release the need to have them live up to my expectations.

I read a quote once talking about if a flower doesn't grow, then you need to change the environment and stop blaming the flower. But I have this to say in response: sometimes those flowers won't grow, no matter how much you fix their environment! And you know what? It isn't your burden to bear.

Remove your responsibility of needing others to accept your energy, your love, your mind, your choices. It is YOUR life, boo. It is you!

I am not blowing the situations, people, or things from my life with this non-chalant sounding phrase. It is powerful. It allows me to re-center myself and realize how little I do have within my control. The only thing I can control in all of this life..... is......wait for it:

ME.

And how I react to what happens or has occurred to me. That's it. I am only driving this one meat suit.

This life you are given isn't a game. This is your one and only opportunity to live your life to your highest potential. To be the best fucking version of YOU that you can be. And the worst way to do that.... is by being held back by the expectations that others will receive all you have to give to them. People can only meet us as deeply as they have met themselves. There is so much to think on with that one small phrase.

Look at your own relationship within yourself. Are you aware of all that you are? The magic and wonder that make you up, my little stardust?

It is impossible for you to fill a cup, that is already full. It doesn't make sense, right? And yet, if others have little to no space to accept or receive what you have to give, how can you continously pour yourself into others? How can others receive what you are giving? Our vessels must have the space. Or else, we will be left bereft. Empty. Nothing left to give.

I will never again BEG anyone to stay. I cringe thinking about it. How many times I chained myself to others. How many times I took the responsibility for them, as if their actions were of my own doing. I will never again implore someone to do right by me. I am worthy of people being good to me, because I am good to them.

You are you. And I am me.

And that is what it is. I love me enough to release what isn't mine to have. I empty my hands so the universe can fill them with the right things. I ask to be made empty of these expectations and resolve to be open. I hope that you love yourself enough to do the same. Because you deserve the best for you!

Why? Because I deserve what is for ME. Will it always be what I ask for? Will it always play out how I would want? Nope. And that's totally okay. Why? Because it is what it is!

Release it, gorgeous. Let that shit go! I have had to release people, expecations, and things that I NEVER thought I could live without. And look at me. I am still here living and shit!

While this may be hard (excruciating in some cases), and while it may take a long time to get what is mine to have; I hold out. I honor myself. I deserve that. Shit, so do you!

Because I am done trying to fit the pieces into my life that aren't even a part of the same puzzle I am building. I am not removing their importance. They are still valuable. But I have to recognize that in this puzzle I am working on called life, I have to ensure each piece fits the way that it should, so that everything comes together in the end.

And in closing.....remember:

So, It is what it is, darlings.

And that's perfectly fine with me and my soul!

Good soul talk, friends. Keep on carrying on, you B.A.M.F.!